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030506 *** 23 new pix @ www.solstikkan.has.it ***
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My ex-husband was temperamental, 90% temper and 10% mental.
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Our dog, Longie, suddenly began barking daily at 4 a.m. Irritated and sleepy, my husband, Larry, searched the back yard for what might have disturbed this otherwise placid animal. For three days he found nothing amiss. Then the dog woke up the neighborhood at 3 a.m. with frantic
barking.
When Larry looked out the window, he discovered someone throwing pebbles to land near Longie. Larry hurried outside and found the culprit. Crouching on the other side of the fence was our quiet neighbor, the last man you'd suspect of wrongdoing. My husband demanded to know what he was doing.

"My mother-in-law is visiting," the embarrassed neighbor explained. "If she loses her beauty sleep another night, she says she'll leave."
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I try to take one day at a time but sometimes several days attack me at once.
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Taking a wee break from the golf circuit, Tiger Woods drives his Volvo to an Irish gas station. The attendant greets him in typical Irish manner, unaware of just who the golf pro is. "Top o' the morning!" he
calls out.
As Tiger gets out of the car, two tees fall out of his pocket..

"So, what are those, son?" asks the attendant.

"They're called tees," replies Tiger. "And what would ya be usin 'em for,
now?" inquires the Irishman.
"Well, they're for resting my balls on when I drive," replies Tiger.

"Jaysus, Mary an' Joseph!" exclaims the Irish attendant. "Those fellas at Volvo think of everything!"
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Women believe if a pet cat strays, it's because of a lack of affection at home.

Women believe if a pet dog strays, it's because of a lack of affection at home.

Women believe if a woman strays, it's because of a lack of affection at home.

Women believe if a man strays, it's because men are scum.
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There are these two secretaries, a Blonde and a Red Head and the Red Head gets flowers sent to her.
The Blonde says, Boy those sure are pretty.
The Red Head says, Yes and I will probably have my legs behind my head all weekend.
The Blonde says, Why? don't you have a vase??
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Why is it good to have a blonde passenger?
You can park in the handicap zone.
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The doctor tells his patient: "Linda, I have some good news and some bad news."
Linda asks for the good news first.
"Well, the test results are in, and the good news is that you aren't suffering from Pre-menstrual Syndrome, as you'd feared."
"And the bad news?" Linda asks.
To which the Doc replies: "I'm afraid there's no cure for being a natural bitch."
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A pretty woman, carrying a stack of boxes from a shopping spree, was walking down the street when all of a sudden a strong wind lifts her skirt.

The hillbilly standing nearby just looked and smiled. The woman snaps at him, "Well, I can see that you're no gentleman!"

The hillbilly says, "And I can see you ain't one, neither!"
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What's the most important question to ask when you want to have safe sex?
What time will your husband get home?
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030506 *** 23 new pix @ www.solstikkan.has.it ***
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