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030417 -!- Happy Easter @ www.solstikkan.has.it !!!!
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If you want your wife to listen and pay undivided attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep!
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New dog video at www.panda-sonic.has.it
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The convicted rapist was brought up in front of the Folsom Prison parole board for review.
The board chairman read the man's record, which had dozens of arrests for unnatural sex acts with women from Sacramento to Anaheim.
"Are we expected to believe that this prison term has cured you of your perversions?"
Oh, yes," said the prisoner.
"Just ask the guard who's standing behind me... I'll never touch another woman again, will I, darling?"
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Did you hear about Arby's new sandwich?
It's called "Jacques Chirac and Vladimir Putin." It's a French dip with Russian dressing.
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Bill had just returned from a week of honeymooning, and his best friend asked him how it went.
"The first night we did it nine times,"
"The second night, eight times.
The third night, seven times.
The fourth night, six times.
The fifth night, five times.
The sixth night, four times,
and the last night, nothing!"
"Nothing?" his pal asked. "How come?"
"Hey, you ever tried shoving a wet noodle up a wild cat's ass"?
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The Vatican has decided that it is not a sin to kiss a nun, just don't get into the habit.
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Matters had progressed to the point where the freshman and his date were naked in the motel bed when the girl had a change of heart.
"I suppose you're going to tell me now that you're waiting for 'Mr. Right'," he said dejectedly.
"That's a silly old romantic notion," laughed the coed. "I'm just waiting for Mr. Big."
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A new employee was invited to the boss's house for dinner, as a way of welcoming him into the company. After they had eaten a large meal, the new employee leaned sideways on his chair and let an almighty fart at the dinner table.
The boss, with a look of disgust, turned to the man and said, "How dare you fart in front of my wife?!"
The guy replied, "Sorry I didn't realize it was her turn!"
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Seems there was a redhead, a brunette and a blonde...all six months pregnant sitting in the doctors waiting room for thier appointments.
The redhead looks at the others and says " I'm having a girl because I was on top when I conceived".
The brunette then says " well, I'm having a boy because I was on bottom
when I conceived".
About that time, the blonde starts to cry and the others ask "what's wrong?" The blonde replies "I guess I'm having puppies".
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New dog video at www.panda-sonic.has.it
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What drives a lesbian up the wall?
A crack in the ceiling.
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030417 -!- Happy Easter @ www.solstikkan.has.it !!!!
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