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030401 - ! - new daily pix @ www.solstikkan.has.it - !!!
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Why do most men prefer women with big tits and tight twats?
Because most men have big mouths and small dicks.
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Morris complained to his friend Irving, that love making with his wife was becoming routine and boring.

"Get creative Morris. Break up the monotony. Why don't you try 'playing doctor' for an hour? That's what I do," said Irving.

"Sounds great," Morris replied, "but how do you make it last for an hour?"

"Just keep her in the waiting room for 55 minutes!"
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A mother of five decides to get plastic surgery on her privates so her husband can enjoy the snugness she had in her youth.
So, she heads off to the doctor for the procedure.
Once the procedure is done, she wakes up to find three roses on her
bed, and asks the nurse who sent them.
The nurse says, "The doctor wanted you to know he appreciates the business, so he left you a rose. Then your husband came in with a rose, stating that he can't wait to feel the results of the surgery, so he left a rose, too."

"What about the third rose?" asks the patient.

"Oh, that's from Ed in the burn unit. He wanted to say thanks for the new ears."
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I'm so depressed... I went to the Dr. today and he refused to write me a prescription for Viagra. Said it would be like putting a new flagpole on a condemned building.
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What do you get when you cross a Chinese person and a hooker?
Someone who'll suck your laundry clean.
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Little Johnny was in his math class one day when the teacher singled him out.
"If I gave you $200," the teacher began, "and you gave $50 to Mary, $50 to Sally and $50 to Susan, what would you have?"

"An orgy," Johnny answered.
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Nymphomania is one disease where the patient enjoys being bedridden!!
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There was a mature gentleman wandering around in a supermarket calling out at intervals, "Crisco, Cris--co!"

Finally a store clerk approached. "Sir, the Crisco is on aisle five."

"Oh," replied the old gentleman, "I'm not looking for cooking Crisco, I
am calling my wife."

"Your wife is named "Crisco?"

"Nah," he answered, "I only call her that when we come to the supermarket."

"Oh? What do you call her when you are not in the supermarket?"

"Lard ass."
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Soon after the late night news on television, the groom asked his blonde bride, "Honey, what do you think of the Middle East position?"
Bride, "I don't know, I've never tried it."
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030401 - ! - new daily pix @ www.solstikkan.has.it - !!!
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