===============================================================
030322 -- !! new pix @ www.solstikkan.has.it !!
=============================================================
There is a new study out about women. I thought these results were pretty interesting.

85% of women think their ass is too big...

10% of women think their ass is too little...

The other 5% say that they don't care, they love him and would have married him anyway.
================================================================
A man goes to an exotic tropical island for a vacation. As the boat nears the island, he notices the constant sound of drumming coming from the island. As he gets off the boat, he asks the first native he sees how long the drumming will go on.

The native casts about nervously and says, "Very bad when the drumming stops."

At the end of the day, the drumming is still going on and is starting to get on his nerves. So, he asks another native when the drumming will stop.

The native looks as if he has just been reminded of something very unpleasant. "Very bad when the drumming stops," he says, and hurries off.

After a couple of days with little sleep, our tourist is finally fed up, grabs the nearest native, slams him up against a tree, and shouts, "What happens when the drumming stops?!"

The scared native answers, "Bass solo."
================================================================
A man went in for an interview for a job as a sales man. The interview went quite well, but the trouble was that he kept winking.

The interviewer said, "Although you have a lot of the qualities we are looking for, the fact that you keep winking could put a lot of our potential customers off."

"Oh, that is no problem," said the man. "I stop winking if I take a couple of aspirin."

"Show me," said the interviewer.

So the man reached into his pocket. Embarrassingly he pulled out loads of condoms of every variety - ribbed, flavoured, coloured and everything before he found the packet of aspirin. He took an aspirin and soon stopped winking.

The interviewer said, "I do not think we could employ someone who would be womanizing all over the country."

"Excuse me!" exclaimed the man, "I am a happily married man, not a womanizer!"

"Well, how do you explain all the condoms, then?" asked the interviewer.

The man replied, "Have you ever gone into a drug store, winking, and
asked for a packet of aspirin?"
==============================================================
Two guys had been having a few beers at the bar together recounting old times when, by chance the call of nature caused them to line up at adjascent urinals at the same time, still deep in conversation.

But Fred could hardly ignore the fact that Chas was very well endowed.

"I say, thats a remarkable tool you have there old boy," Fred was prompted to remark.

"Wasn't always that way," replied Chas, "Medical science can do wonders with transplants these days," he said. "I got this done over in Harley Street, England, cost a thousand bucks, but as you can see, well worth
every cent."

Fred was very envious. In fact, he packed his bag that night and flew off to the Old Dart first thing. It was a good six months later before he ran into his old cobber once again and Fred could hardly wait to tell him that he had taken his advise and was well pleased with the result.

"But Chas, I will tell you something else," said Fred.

"You were diddled, I got mine for $500, not a thousand."

Chas could hardly believe it. Same address in Harley Street, same doctor. Thinking that he had been ripped off, he asked Fred if he could take a look.

Once more they lined up at the porcelain and when Chas took a peek over the partition the worried frown which had creased his face disappeared.

"No wonder," he laughed. "Thats my old one!"
================================================================
A man was sitting in a bar and noticed a group of people using sign language. He also noticed that the bartender was using sign language to speak to them.

When the bartender returned to him, the man asked how he had learned to use sign language. The bartender explained that these were regular customers and had taught him to speak in sign. The man thought that was great.

A few minutes later the man noticed that the people in the group were waving their hands around very wildly. The bartender looked over and signed, "Now cut that out!

I warned you!" and threw the group out of the bar.

The man asked why he had done that and the bartender replied,
"If I told them once I told them 100 times - No singing in the bar!"
=============================================================
INQUIRING MINDS
A graduate with a science degree asks, "Why does it work?"
The graduate with an engineering degree asks, "How does it work?"
The graduate with an accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?"
The graduate with a liberal arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"
===============================================================
What's the difference between a blonde guy and a blonde girl?
The blonde girl's sperm count is higher.
===============================================================
030322 -- !! new pix @ www.solstikkan.has.it !!
=============================================================