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030124 - !!! 20 new pix at www.solstikkan.has.it
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EVER THINK ABOUT THIS?
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out"?
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A mountain woman went to the doctor and was told to go home and come back in a couple of days with a specimen. When she got home she asks her husband, "What is a specimen?"
He replies. "Hell if I know. Go next door and ask Edith. She's a nurse"

The woman goes next door and comes back in about twenty minutes with her clothes all torn and with multiple cuts and bruises on her face and body. "What in the world happened?" asked her husband.
"Damn if I know," she replies. "I asked Edith what a specimen was and she told me to go piss in a bottle. I told her to go shit in her hat and then all hell broke loose.
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The manager of a large Wall Sreet office noticed one of his department heads had hired a new man, so the boss called him into his office for a little orientation speech.
"What is your name?" he asked.

"Dick," the new guy replied.

The manager scowled, "Look, I don't know what kind of place you worked at before, but I don't call anyone by their first name.
It breeds familiarity and that leads to a breakdown in authority.
I refer to my employees by their last names only - Smith, Jones, Lopez - that's all. I am to be referred to only as Mr. Robertson.
Now that we got that straight, what is your last name?"

The new guy sighed and said, "Darling. Dick Darling."

"Okay, Dick, the next thing I want to tell you is....."
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Morris goes to visit his cardiologist in follow up after his life threatening heart attack.

The doctor explains to Morris that he would be able to resume his active sex life as soon as he could climb three flights of stairs without becoming winded.

Morris listens attentively and then says, "But what if I look for the women who live on the ground floor?"
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An Army grunt stands in the rain with a 35-pound pack on his back, 15 lb. weapon in hand, after having marched 12 miles, and says, "This is shit!"

An Army Airborne Ranger stands in the rain with a 45 lb. pack on his back, weapon in hand, after having jumped from an airplane and marched 18 miles, and says with a smile, "This is good shit!"

A Navy SEAL lies in the mud, 55 LB pack on his back, weapon in hand, after swimming 10 miles to shore, crawling through a swamp and marching 25 miles at night past the enemy positions, says with a grin, "This really is great shit."

A Marine, up to his nose in the stinking, bug infested mud of a swamp with a 65 LB pack on his back and a weapon in both hands after jumping from an aircraft at high altitude, into the ocean, swimming 12 miles to the shore, killing several alligators to enter the swamp, then crawling 30 miles through the brush to assault an enemy camp, says, "I love this shit."

The Air Force NCO sits in an easy chair in an air-conditioned office, and says, "My e-mail's out? What kind of shit is this?"
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A blonde and a brunette were discussing their boyfriends:

Brunette: Last night I had *three* orgasms in a row!

Blonde: That's nothing; last night I had over ten.

Brunette: My god! I had no idea he was that good.

Blonde: ( looking shocked ) Oh, you meant with one guy.
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A young man is driving down the street in his Caddie.
He stops at a stop light when a sexy blonde prostitute approaches the car.
She says," Hey there, I can give you the best sex of your life."
So the man gladly accepts and takes the hooker to a hotel.

They go into the hotel room, he tells the hooker to "prepare" while he
goes in the bathroom to get ready himself. When he comes out he has earplugs in his ears, a nose plug in his nose,
and a condom on his 12 inch dick.

The hooker asks,"What is all that for?"
He said,"I hate the way a women screams,and I hate the smell of burning rubber."
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030124 - !!! 20 new pix at www.solstikkan.has.it
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